And then there are the games so full of promise you pre-order them, religiously follow their development process, even make custom screensavers with the hi-resolution screencaps posted to hundreds of sites the minute they are released to the press. All this to only be extremely frustrated and outraged with the final product once you finally load the game.

When you review video games you are bound to have a game land in your lap every so often that becomes an absolute chore to play. You will think of all kinds of excuses to not sit down with that horrendous piece of code. There’s laundry to be done, you need to pick up the mess the dog left in the yard, or maybe you’d rather scrub the bathroom in a fraternity house. Anything you can do to avoid the inevitable hair-pulling, vocabulary-stretching and possible controller in the wall/TV will help you keep some bit of sanity.

Procrastinating can only go for so long, though. Once you run out of excuses, you force yourself to sit down, take a deep breath, and suffer through one or more of the following:

~ poor/unresponsive controls
~ insanely hard difficulty that cannot be adjusted
~ weak story, sometimes taking hours before it goes anywhere
~ repetitive levels
~ recurring glitches and freezing
~ complete and utter boredom
~ poor online multiplayer support

One of the more recent titles I’ve had the (dis)pleasure of putting in my DS was My Baby First Steps, a babysitting/parenting simulator geared towards the pre-teen female gamer. With an open mind I set forth on my digital toddler raising adventure. In my earlier days I spent many nights babysitting younger cousins and kids of family friends so I could spoil myself just a little. I knew just how tough it was to change the runny diaper of a squirming, screaming 15 month old and keep an eye on the other children terrorizing each other while I was in another room. How hard could it be to take care of one digital child just learning to walk and utter their first words?

Not more than five minutes into the game and the simple task of dragging the stuffed bunny toy across the screen to encourage my little one to crawl had already begun to wear my patience thin. Worried that the added pressure I was now applying to my stylus might damage the fragile screen, I put the game aside to resume once my hand returned to normal. It was off and on again with My Baby First Steps for a few days until I just couldn’t take it anymore.

An afternoon bath that I had performed successfully a few times in a row took a turn for the worse when the stylus’ movements simply would not register with the game. For fifteen minutes I re-scrubbed that baby all over and still the game did not register I had completed the task. That was the last straw. I snapped the lid of my DS shut, yanked the cartridge out of the system and threw it across the room, with expletives and noises of pure rage filling my apartment. I’m sure that three of the white hairs I yanked from my head that week were caused by that game.

Several months later, I am reading every press release and watching every trailer for Naughty Bear, an M rated game in which you hurt, maim and terrify your way through one map, earning points so that you can unlock new missions using that same level. Wash, rinse, repeat. At first the game looked like it would be a lot of fun. The marketing team did an amazing job. Too bad they didn’t tell you it was one level design that you would play over and over again and that there was a lack of variety in missions. Add on the fact that the game froze twice at the exact same spot finishing up the very first mission. I let it go the first time, but when it happened that second instance, I powered down my 360 and started to write my review of the game.

Of course I went back and gave it another shot. No reviewer should ever base a review of a video game solely on one level. At this point, I still hadn’t discovered that I’d be playing that same map over and over again until I could run it in my sleep. Dutifully, I ran the game again and again, not usually playing more than one or two missions in a session. No matter what the game threw at me there just was no spark. I finally hit a roadblock while playing a stealth mission that I just couldn’t forgive. That was it. The glitches, the boredom, seeing the same things over and over – I snapped. I quietly put my controller back on top of my system and found a pillow to scream into. All the disappointment and rage that had been building up inside me finally came to the surface.

When I come face to face with a bad video game, it breaks my heart. There simply is no excuse for bad games, especially now, in the Hi-Def, motion controlled generation we live in. Bringing a game to retail means that it is at its maximum potential. You have done everything in your power as a game developer to ensure that I am going to have an amazing adventure with your latest digital masterpiece. Releasing work that clearly needs more time in the studio is a slap in the face to the gamers who have been impatiently waiting to see the amazing journeys you promised.

That moment when I finally come to terms with the fact that my gaming heart has been ripped from my chest and trampled over by a legion of Darkspawn is the “rage-quit” rearing its ugly head. The heartache overwhelms the Wall of Tolerance, leaving me no choice but to scream, punch and flail my arms about wildly as I denounce the atrocity before me. No controllers or consoles have been destroyed to date, however there have been some game discs that found new life as frisbees….. until the wind carried them off to some poor unsuspecting sap.

If we didn’t love games as much as we did, we would simply put aside the controller and find something else to do. Alas, we are in love with the pixels and polygons, so this song and dance is one we will repeat over and over again in hopes that the next game will band-aid the scars left from ones before.

*Cues the song and prepares to dance*

~~~~~

Gamer Banter is a monthly blog-share project put together by Terry Bosky of GameCouch. This month’s topic for discussion was: What is the worst game you’ve ever played?

Please check out the other contributions.

Game Couch: The Worst Game Ever
Silvercublogger: It’s all about integrity
Master Kitty’s World: What were they thinking???
Zath: What’s the worst game you’ve ever played?
SnipingMizzy: What is there to love?
The Game Fanatics: What is the worst game you’ve ever played?
Pioneer Project: Making the best of a bad situation
gunthera1_gamer: The game I could have loved!
The Average Gamer: Gamer Banter: Worst Game EVAR!
Extra Guy: Battle Blaze — 700 pounds of ‘don’t do it’

Starring: Abe Hiroshi, Kuroki Meisa
Genre: Crime
Episodes: 10
TV Station: TBS
Air Dates: Apr 18, 2010 – June 20, 2010

Based on the novel by Higashino Keigo

In the quiet district of Kodenma, secrets and lies begin to surface as the police investigate the murder of a woman who’d recently moved to the area. Mineko Mitsui is found strangled to death in her apartment with very few clues to aid the police; one is a button found on the floor, another a box of sweets from a bakery.

Detective Kyoichiro Kaga (Hiroshi Abe), recently transferred to the local police department, finds himself partnered up with his younger cousin and takes to the streets of Ningyo Town (Doll Town) pursuing the few leads and uncovering the truths some locals would rather keep hidden. Each new discovery leads Kaga towards his goal of finding out the truth, even if it means he goes another day without tasting the extremely popular taiyaki from a prominent local bakery.

Mineko’s family is the center of attention as her husband and son are the primary suspects, but both claim they had no idea where she had moved to or who could have wanted to harm her. Her son Koki left home prior to his parents’ divorce and moved to Kodenma-cho, moving in with his girl friend and working hard to realize his dream of being an actor. Naohiro, her husband, is having money problems with his cleaning business, having to lay off employees to help keep him afloat.

But family members aren’t the only suspects. Several people had met Mineko in the days following up to her unfortunate end. There’s the insurance agent who was the last person seen with Mineko, a girl with an unhealthy obsession for Hello Kitty,  a close friend of the deceased and her fiance, amongst others. Kaga’s relentless pursuit of the truth dispels the shadows surrounding the suspects, helping families heal along the way.

Shinzanmono hits all the right notes in a market filled with police dramas. Hiroshi Abe slips perfectly into the shoes of Detective Kaga, once again showing he is a man with great range and versatility. Shinzanmono ranks number two in my list of shows featuring Hiroshi, with Kekkon Dekinai Otoko still taking number one spot.

The concept was alluring – an M rated game starring an evil and malicious stuffed animal hell-bent on revenge and destruction. Everything seen in previews and trailers looked promising. It was one of the few summer releases that actually was on my “To Buy” list. Unfortunately, once Naughty Bear made its way into my Xbox 360 nothing but disappointment followed.

Poor Naughty. He didn't deserve this.

The repetitive nature of the game coupled with a map that never seems to change is just the first of many complaints I have with Naughty Bear. While the game offers seven chapters with additional challenges, the map is exactly the same each time with very minimal changes to the goals for each challenge. They always have one particular Bear that you need to reach and punish and the optional destruction of X amount of item (insert gift, bird, rosette, etc here). Some challenges require stealth, or simply to not be injured, and that’s all fine and good. Games should be both fun and challenging. However, when you are on your twelfth attempt to clear a challenge asking you to not be seen and out of nowhere five enemies all seem to see you trying to cross the bridge to the next section of the map, you just want to throw your hands up in the air and walk away.

Clearing these challenges is imperative to your advancement in the game. The trophies gained from completing a level helps to unlock additional challenges and main story levels, as well as costumes to increase various stats for Naughty. It’s too bad that playing through them begins to feel like a chore. I would much rather scrub a toilet in a public bathroom than attempt one more run-through on an Indestructible mode challenge.

Ahh! The refreshing feel of water swirling around your head.

Earning points isn’t all that difficult. You can really add to the multiplier meter by sabotaging items and laying a trap right in front of it, then hiding in the forest until some poor sucker gets caught and scaring the stuffing out of him. Then let him limp around the disco for a while before slamming his head into the fire-pit and watching him burn to a smoldering pile of nothingness. But when you get to the challenges that require you to stay out of sight, you have to rely on sabotage and traps to buffer up some points, which is extremely boring and seems to take forever. Over time the de-fluffication moves become stale and you would rather just stab the opposition to death than set up the more elaborate kills and scares.

Naughty Bear also has a multiplayer game mode, but I was not able to experience it. All of my attempts to join matches failed. More often than not I would find myself all alone in the lobby, waiting patiently for someone to arrive. And when someone did show up, they disappeared almost as fast as the arrived. If there had been people available to play with, the multiplayer may have been entertaining, especially with friends.

My other major issue with Naughty Bear was with the sheer amount of glitches that I encountered. The very first level I played my game froze right as I was walking through the gate back to Naughty’s house to end the episode. Frustrating, but I can forgive it the first time. Second glitch I run into, literally, was getting stuck in a tree in the forest surrounding the Disco. Another disappointment as I was just about to progress to the last area of the map. There was also poor collision detection with the doors of the buildings. Often times bears would be standing in the doorway and the doors would close on them, but the bear would be fused with the door. Several times, especially during Stealth and Untouchable modes, I would be attacking an enemy who was coming through the door. And somehow, bears would be able to see or attack me even if the door was closed.

Overall Opinion

Naughty Bear could have been a lot of fun, but it underwhelms and under delivers. A major disappointment as it was one of the few summer titles that had originally caught my interest. Perhaps if the game had released with fewer glitches and more variety in the levels it would have seen a longer stay in my 360.

Buy Naughty Bear on Xbox 360 or PS3 from Amazon today

By day, you are a typical high school junior. You go to class, make friends, participate in school clubs and work part time for some extra spending money. By night, you and your dorm-mates enter into a time known as the Dark Hour where you battle your way up the looming tower Tartarus in hopes that you can right wrongs belonging to those who came before you. The story of Persona 3 still holds up as one of the best and most enjoyable titles I have had the pleasure of wasting away my time with the JRPG category over the past few years.

P3P strikes a wonderful balance between grinding in the randomly generated levels of the Tartarus dungeon and enhancing your Persona-wielding life-style with extra-curricular activities. Exploring Tartarus and defeating the Shadows lurking around each and every corner brings you closer to ending the Dark Hour for good. Making friends and creating strong bonds with them is what brings additional power to the Persona you create to assist you in your quest.

Unlocking Personas is like catching Pokemon. Once you start, you just can’t stop! When you first enter Tartarus you’ll only have the inherent Orpheus available. As you defeat Shadows you’ll be able to hold more Personas acquired by obtaining special tarot cards. The further you climb to the top of Tartarus, the more powerful the cards you can find. Visiting the Velvet Room, a mainstay of the Persona franchise, you’ll want to fuse as many new Personas as possible, with some instances requiring up to six Persona cards in a fusion.

Featured in this new handheld version of the game, P3P now allows you to chose between a male or female main character. Social Links with classmates and other residents around Port Island will differ depending on which you choose. While the overall story is the same, it’s the little things that impact you will remember your high school days.

Social Linking with Yukari strengthens the Lovers Arcana

This being my second time through the story of the SEES group, I chose to experience life at Gekkoukan High School as a female student. Choosing the female option, your cursor and other icons are a soft shade of pink as opposed to the blue for the male option. I joined several clubs, including the volleyball team and student council, making a lot of wonderful female friends. I also spent time after school hanging out with fellow SEES members Junpei and Akihiko in an attempt to get closer to them. With the female character, you can also choose if Igor’s assistant in the Velvet Room is the beloved Elizabeth or the new male option, Theodore.

The one aspect of playing with the female character that I was most interested in exploring was seeing if it was possible for her to date the guys around her much as the male character could in the original. I spent nights slaving at Chagall Cafe either working or just having the Pheromone Coffee so that I could increase my Charm to a level that would allow me to build my Social Link with the dreamy and sought-after Akihiko-senpai. Sadly, there was no smooching or hand holding to be had. Once I had maxed out the Social Link, Akihiko was not to be found in his usual spot Monday and Friday afternoons in the Lab Hallway. I was unable to find any information to see if I had done anything incorrectly, which means my poor high school crush on Akihiko will forever remain just a crush.

Atlus has also included the part-time job option which allows you to earn some money while increasing your Academic, Charm and Courage skills. Before you could only enhance these skills by studying, correctly answering questions during class and spending money at certain establishments. While you can still simply spend some money and do so, working at a shop helps boost two of these areas at a time as well as pocketing some money to help by that fancy new weapon you’ve got your eye on.

My favourite new additions to P3P are the outrageous outfits to stuff into my wardrobe. It’s an added bonus that your characters really do wear these in Tartarus. My favourite was the Battle Panties, a white bra and panty set with matching knee-high stockings giving the wearer a plus two stat bump to their Magic skills. Santa suits, bathing suits and maid outfits are other special apparel you can collect.

Other tweaks to P3P include bringing two new difficulty modes, meaning you now have five degrees of difficulty at your fingertips, as well as the much desired battle command control as was offered in Persona 4. Using the Tactics option from your in-battle menu, you can now set parameters for those members currently part of your team. This option can only be accessed when you are controlling the main character and gives you a much better handle on those tough bosses.

Use the Battle Menu to set Tactics for your AI characters

P3P is not a perfect port of the original PS2 title. Due to the limitations of the PSP disc, the anime cut-scenes have been replaced with game graphic voiced over scenarios. I do miss them, but it is a small sacrifice to make in order to have everything else introduced to this version of P3. Also excluded from P3P is the additional content The Answer which was released with Persona 3: FES.

Overall Opinion

Since P3P arrived at my doorstep I have done nothing aside from spend all day on my PSP. Even in my sleep, I am thinking of what extra-curricular activities I want to do over the next school week, figure out how many floors in Tartarus I want to climb and which types of Personas I need to create so that I can get the best of the best for the inevitable final battle. Looking for something to waste countless of hours on? Then this is your game, as you can grind and grind to your heart’s content. There is so much content on this disc that it’s about to burst at the seams. Do yourself a favour and buy this game now. Buy it for a friend, too. Share the love of the twisted darkness that is Persona with as many people as you can.

Buy Shin Megami Tensei: Persona 3 Portable from Amazon today!

Going completely controller-free is not in my future, no matter how hard some companies might be trying to steer us in that direction. Part of being a gamer is memorizing button combos and having something in your hands you could almost throw at your TV. The controller is a natural extension of who and what we are.

At first I thought that we were set with the ridiculousness of the Wii. A controller shaped like a remote, waving our arms around, starving for real games and then watching as the great games sold horribly while the shovelware flew off store shelves. The Wii quickly became a hot item for the casual and new gamer demographics, with slews of four player sporting games leading the way. Nintendo also brought out some games for their core gamers, however the wait time in between those games turned a lot of those original purchases into dust collecting machines.

At E3 2010, Microsoft and Sony showcased their new motion control line up for the coming Holiday season. I was not at E3, so my opinions below do not contain any hands-on experience, but I believe there are other gamers who share in my hesitance to have another console turn into another fitness program.

Xbox Kinect (aka-Project Natal)

After everything I have seen and read post-E3, Kinect looks to be a large disappointment for its core gamers. Microsoft’s desire to convert more casual gamers to the system is all fine and good, but it’s a major slap in the face to the long term supporters. Not adding optional support for console selling franchises such as Halo and Gears of War doesn’t entice those hardcore FPS and action adventure gamers to run out and drop the $150 on a fancy motorized camera.

Being completely upfront with my readers, I strongly favour my Xbox 360 over my PS3 or the household Wii. I have spent thousands of dollars on retail and DLC games, I pay for a Gold subscription so that I can play online with my friends. I am not against purchasing accessories and games for a console if I believe that I am going to have a great gaming experience. Kinect’s high price tag and a launch line up of completely casual games that remind me of all the shovelware titles that we’ve previously seen on the Wii make me want to keep that $150 in my pocket. And not including any games (as of now) in that package leaves a nasty taste in my mouth.

The only impressive game that I saw for Kinect was Dance Central, which I’m sure will be a hit with people who want to dance. Me, not so much. From everything I’ve read about it and impressions of people I know who were able to try it out, Dance Central is fun and challenging and worked well with the Kinect camera.

If Kinect remains a tool used only for casual and family games, it will inevitably fail. As much as they believe their hardcore gamers will be buying this on day one, I think that they will be shocked when that does not happen. I don’t know too many people who want to wave their hands around or use voice commands to play movies. Voice commands are fine if you’re the only person in the room, but what happens when you are having a party and everyone is talking? Who’s voice will the system respond to? How will it be able to differentiate amongst everyone in the room and pick out only your voice? And if someone walks behind you while you are playing, how can the Xbox be certain that person is just walking by and not mistake their actions as someone else trying to sign in? These are just a few questions I have not found the answers to, and we probably won’t until much closer to the November launch.

They talk a big game on how Kinect will be something their core gamers will embrace, yet I fail to see anything that makes me feel the need to run out and pre-order this today. We’ll see how things change as we come closer to the Holiday 2010 launch of Kinect and what Microsoft does to counteract a potential loss of sales to the Playstation Move.

Playstation Move

Instead of going completely controller free, Sony’s Move is a lot like the Wii – two unique controller pieces working together with the Eye (camera) to bring the player a new sense of involvement with their Playstation gaming. So while you can choose to play games swinging your arms around, you’ll at least look as though you’re actually doing something.

The key difference between Kinect and Move is that Sony is ensuring it’s motion controllers will resonate with the potential new and casual gamer markets as well as their core gamers. They are bringing a solid mix of family, casual and hardcore games to the PS3 that will make use, if you so choose, of the Move controllers. Killzone 3 and the newest SOCOM title will both offer DualShock 3 and Move support, giving their core gamers a perfect reason to invest in Move. It’s nice to be able to play with your family every once in a while, but there are times when you want to play online with your buddies, and pretending to look down the scope of a sniper rifle is more fun with a controller than it is just pointing your finger at a screen.

Another bonus with Move is that Sony has announced that their Move line-up will be retailing for $39.99 per title (this does not include other titles that support Move controls such as Killzone 3, etc). Smarter still is their introduction Move bundle for people who would like to be up and running with a  game. Granted, it is the standard sports collection, but it is better than getting a peripheral without any software.

While games like Invizimals and the sports collection are not titles I would spend my money on, Sony will be bringing out some action adventure titles such as Heroes on the Move and the Sly Cooper Collection which has a lot of the core gamers talking. These are the kinds of games that Microsoft is missing from it’s launch line up – games that do more than have you swat flies from the screen or run on the spot. Sony already made those types of games for the PS2 when they released the EyeToy.

My only concern with Move is that I might experience the same stiffness/soreness in my wrist that I get when playing a Wii game for more than 20 minutes. Holding a traditional style controller is much more natural position. While I may not play a Move title for an extended period of time, they are bringing some excellent titles to the system that I am sure will have me using my PS3 more often than I do now.

~~~

I’d love to hear any thoughts or concerns that any readers of this post might have. Objective thoughts only, please!

Review for GamingAngels – Dec 28, 2009

One of the best known series in casual gaming history, Diner Dash is the one that started Flo’s gaming superstardom. Flo’s job is stressing her out and she decides to open her own restaurant. You will control the new and improved 3-D version of Flo, running around the restaurant seating your guests, taking checks to the pass, waiting on tables and cleaning up once they have enjoyed their meals. Its all about utilizing your time and figuring out how to serve the most amount of customers without sacrificing excellent service.

As with the original version of the game, you start out with just a few tables in a run-down hole in the wall. As you meet and beat your goals, more tables and upgrades to your restaurant will be awarded to you. Eventually you will have several 2-tops and 4-tops to service. Create chains for added bonuses by performing the same action several times in a row. Each level gives you a regular goal which you must meet to clear the level, as well as an Expert goal which gets you the Gold Trophy “I really ate the whole thing!” for achieving this rank on every level.

Flo is now 3-D, which moves the player away from the original point and click play of the computer versions that started the Dash craze. Using the left stick you will run around the restaurant and try to earn as much as you can in the allotted time. My only issue was some minor collision detection. If I wasn’t standing in exactly the right spot, I couldn’t interact with the diners or tables, having to waste precious seconds trying to find just the right spot. I also found myself bumping into the tables quite a bit and wasting time trying to run in a giant arc around them.

And then I discovered there are shortcuts. You can tell Flo to bring an order up by pushing Square, take her to the counter to pick up orders with Triangle, and bring the dishes to the cart with Circle. If you decide you want to change what you are doing while Flo is heading in one of those directions, simply move the left analog stick to regain control. Keep an eye out for the flashing upgrade icon in the top right corner. Once you have enough money and it starting blinking away, hit the Select button and choose which upgrade you would like to add to the restaurant.

There are four restaurants in career mode for you to complete, as well as added features of Endless Mode and multiplayer modes. You can choose Head to Head mode or Team Dash, allowing up to eight players to compete for bragging rights. I played Tip Wars and Endless Mode online, and both ran very smoothly. (Which is a nice change of pace for me, as most of my PS3 online play has  been brutal in the past.) One of the control modes we tried during this time was Cursor mode, where there is a giant arrow you move around instead of Flo. This mode was a bit clunky and hard to get used to, so I don’t recommend it.

Bringing a game such as Diner Dash to the PSN and XBLA is a great move. It makes the game accessible to people who are not that big into casual games, as well as brings casual gamers to a console where they can play with their loved ones. Nothing is lost in translation from PC to console, which is a huge plus.

Diner Dash is available on both the PSN and XBLA. This review is based on the PSN version of the game.

Purchase a Bloons code from Amazon

Reviewed for GamingAngels – Dec 18, 2009

Sometimes you just want a simple distraction, something that doesn’t require reaching a checkpoint. I was looking for something along these lines for a trip I recently took, and since I had a bit of money left in my PSN wallet, I decided to check out a couple different Minis games. The first one I purchased was Bloons, which caught my attention first because of the price, and secondly because a friend had mentioned it when I asked Twitter for suggestions.

Bloons gives you control of a delightful little monkey who throws darts at balloons. Each level gives you a target amount of balloons that must be popped in order to proceed. In the beginning, its relatively simple, aiming with the digital pad left and right to throw your allotted darts. As you progress, you will discover special balloons containing items such as bombs or ice, which when popped will destroy or alter your level. Some types of bricks you encounter will also have special properties, like breaking when hit or be rubbery, causing darts to bounce off them. Eventually I discovered that I could also push up or down on the digital pad to increase and decrease the height I wished my darts to soar to. (I skipped the tutorial, otherwise I would have known that sooner.)

Overall, Bloons offers quite a challenge and is well worth the money spent. There are around 70 levels of increasing difficulty to be mastered and with the added feature of a level editor, you can always try to create your own should you feel the desire to. It’s a great game to play for a level or two at a time or for as long as you want.

Purchase a Zombie Tycoon code from Amazon

Reviewed for GamingAngels – Dec 26, 2009

In my opinion, you can never have too many video games with zombies. Usually, you are spending all your time shooting them in the head, severing their limbs and trying to figure out how to stop the outbreak from spreading. We spend all this time destroying them, but what about the people who create and control them?

Zombie Tycoon pits you as a budding ZEO (Zombie Executive Officer). You are given access to three zombie units with which you will terrorize the streets, destroying buildings and eating brains as you plan your global domination. Each of the game’s ten levels boasts a new map with various obstacles and items to collect. With the over 100 items, you can arm your zombie minions to the teeth, equipping them with items such as balloons to lift them over crevasses or gas masks to keep them safe from the toxic fumes people are defending certain buildings with. Capturing hospitals will give you tokens allowing you to increase the size of your respective armies. Each group can be controlled separately using the respective Square, Triangle or Circle buttons, or by using the X button to tell them all to attack the same target.

If you think it’s going to be easy to blast through, then you better be a strategy genius. Eventually the humans decide to fight back, as well as rebuilding hospitals giving them back control. You really need to keep on top of where your zombies are and make sure they aren’t being killed off by someone wielding a chainsaw while you have them attacking a building. You must have your squad near a hospital in order to use the tokens, and if a whole unit falls, you must find a token to revive them before you can build more of that particular group. Sometimes it is best to barrel through, while other times you should venture out a little, regroup, then move out a bit further.

For $8, Zombie Tycoon is well worth the money, as it provides great strategy and a healthy amount of game time.

Super Mario Galaxy 2 shares a lot in common with it’s predecessor: your primary objective is to collect the Power Stars needed to fuel the Luma starship, a Mario shaped planetoid, from one galaxy to another. Along the way you will pick up Star Bits, free trapped Lumas, meet inhabitants from a wide array of unique planets, and cross paths with members of the Toad Brigade scattered about, looking for ways to help you rescue the Princess.

Mario travels the universe with a Luma who hides under his plumber’s cap and gives him the ability to perform spins. Some galaxies also feature Yoshi, the lovable green dino with an appetite for almost anything he can grab with his tongue. And of course there are plenty of Bowser’s minions just waiting for you to pounce on. So far, everything sounds like business as usual for Mario.

Each World contains several galaxies with various stars hidden deep within. Progressing to the next World requires a minimum Star count and an encounter with Bowser Jr. There are your normal golden Stars as well as bonus ones waiting to be discovered. As with Super Mario Galaxy, these can be found by clearing a level with a Comet Coin or performing other tasks on certain planets. You can also purchase access to hidden galaxies by feeding Star Bits to Hungry Lumas. Green Stars only become available once you have unlocked Luigi as a playable character, much like the first Wii adventure.

You will also encounter various “Power Ups” which are at Mario’s disposal. New to Super Mario Galaxy 2 are the Rock Mushroom (giving Mario the ability to turn into a giant boulder and smash things), the Cloud Flower (allows you to create clouds for reaching new heights), and the Power Drill (spin-dig your way through the ground to get from one point to another or enter underground caverns). You’ll also have access to the Fire Flower, the Rainbow Star and the Bee, Boo and Spring Suits.

The game gets major points for the beautiful planet levels, even the ones that I completely loathed playing through. Each level is well detailed and bursting with vibrant colour, sometimes so gorgeous you just have to stop and play with the camera, checking out every single angle. Whether swimming, sticking, rolling or flying, Super Mario Galaxy 2 delivers the graphical eye candy gamers have come to expect from the franchise since it moved to three dimensions.

Unfortunately, the game suffers from a horrible range of difficulty. You’ll go from an incredibly easy level with minimal puzzle solving to a level that frustrates you to the point of nearly throwing your Wiimote into the closest wall. Super Mario Galaxy 2 simply lacks proper difficulty progression which is a major turn off to young children and regular gamers alike. Not everyone has the patience to make twenty-plus attempts to clear a level. And with the exception of Yoshi’s new role in the game, so much of the game feels re-hashed. I kept waiting to be wowed by something other than the graphics, only to continually be let down.

As an example, I was playing through a level with fall-away platforms, meaning you do have to be pretty quick on your feet. No problem, as that’s to be expected in Mario titles. However, the fixed camera angle I was forced to suffer with did not help at all and more often than not, a jump which I should have landed made me hit the edge of the platform and fall to my demise. In that same level, there were several occasions in which I attempted to jump over the moving saws and ended up clipping them, causing me to be stunned. Makes sense, but by the time I recovered and was back on my feet, the saw blades would have pushed me off the edge of the platform. It took me over twenty lives to finally get to the Star in that level, and once I did that, I didn’t want to touch the game for at least twenty four hours.

Depending on what galaxy you are on, you may run into the Cosmic Guide who will assist you in reaching your final destination for that area. If you choose to use her, she will not go out of her way to pick up coins or unneeded special items. It will also cost you upon reaching the Power Star. Instead of the normal Gold Star, you will acquire a Bronze Star. It will allow you to move past the galaxy to what lies beyond, but only Gold Stars add to your tally for unlocking new galaxies. You can always go back and retry the galaxy in which you gained a Bronze Star in hopes you can make it through without the Cosmic Guide’s assistance and reach the Gold Star. I have not noticed the Cosmic Guide to be available in all galaxies though, which means you could be replaying a level dozens of times over before you either give up or hand someone else the controller.

If you didn’t take the original Galaxy title for a spin and you are thinking, “Hey! This supports two players. That’ll be perfect for my kids,” think again. As the second player in the game you have the rather boring role of collecting Star Bits and shooting them at enemies. The supporting role in the Super Mario Galaxy games is ridiculous. There is little in the way of team work, and can (and most likely will) cause arguments. While I was working in video game retail, I had many parents trading in or returning Galaxy disappointed with the 2 player feature.

And let’s be honest, Mario chasing off after a kidnapped Princess Peach every year or so has gotten pretty stale. While the story behind each Mario title is more of a backdrop to exploring the Mushroom Kingdom’s nooks and crannies, there is a definite creative rut. We are only a few years away from the big 3-0, so why not freshen things up a little? Maybe Bowser will retire, Mario & Peach can finally start a family and their offspring can battle it out against one another for the next 30 years. The Toads could finally do something other than tell us the obvious. Anything to have the franchise end on a high note instead of running it through the mud. Mario deserves better than that.

Maybe it’s just the rage-quit rage talking, but I just do not find Super Mario Galaxy 2 to be fun. And really, that’s what I want from my video games. There is nothing wrong with throwing in difficult levels or mind-numbing puzzles, as long as at the end of the day I am enjoying the game I’ve chosen to sit down with. Sadly, Super Mario Galaxy 2 does nothing more than infuriate me and make me want to tear out my hair more often than not, and masochist I am not. Sorry, Mario, but this Princess needs to be rescued from you.

Purchase Super Mario Galaxy 2 from Amazon

Hexyz Force provides you two main characters to play through the story with: Cecilia Armaclite and Levant von Schweitzer. Both characters are Hexyz, re-incarnations of divinities from the dawn of Berge’s beginnings, and each have their own unique story leading them on a quest to tip the scales of Berge’s fate. Atlus truly provides a 2-in-1 roleplaying experience with this amazingly fun and humourous title.

And while Cecilia and Levant each have a unique story, they are not completely separate of each other. At several points throughout their journeys, the two Pillars will meet as they share a similar goal. One story told by the actions of two heroes. Both sides with vibrant, lovable and friends and family fighting for their futures.

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Cecilia’s Story

My first playthrough was with the lazy and slightly ignorant Cecilia, a cleric in the Temple of Palfina who’d rather spend her time staring up at the sky than studying. Her destiny confronts her one afternoon when a thick miasma descends on the Temple, bringing with it monsters and a mysterious evil creature leading them. Suddenly, she is enveloped in a magnificent white light and transported to the Holy Vessel, the source of Force, and informed that she is a Hexyz – a reincarnation of the divine Palfina. She inherits the Staff of Palfina (Holy Riafalt) and is given the task of tipping the scales back towards that of Creation in order to save Berge.

Cecilia reluctantly sets out to gather Force from the Monoliths that keep Berge’s enemy sealed away, with her furry friend Ralu and another Hexyz, Raffi, as her companions. Along the way she will cross paths with races unknown on her side of Berge, meeting both friend and foe from both sides of the Black Precipice.

Levant’s Story

On the other side of Berge, someone kills the fiance of Levant’s ruler, destroying hope for peace with all races on Dark Berge. The death of his beloved suddenly changes Axel, and he commands his armies to purge the land of the Elves, Lycans and all others who seek to destroy him. Levant cannot understand what has happened to his friend, and when he assists those Axel accuses of killing his fiance, Levant is marked and sentenced to death for treason.

Spirited away from the dungeons by Irene, half-sister to Axel whom Levant swore to protect, and a Lycan named Greik, Levant seeks out the truth of what happened that night in the Elven Forest. For he is one of the Pillars, wielder of a holy Ragnafact hidden and protected by the Elves for centuries.

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One of the key components of this game is the use of Force. Force is the energy of Berge, both Creative and Destructive, that flows naturally throughout the world. The Hexyz can utilize this power to search for hidden items, strengthen weapons, open doors and create walkways using Force Scan. Force is gained along with Experience Points at the end of each battle.

The Hexyz characters also wield special weapons bestowed upon them by the divinities they embody. These weapons, Ragnafacts, can be strengthened by infusing them with Force, enhancing three developmental properties. Each Ragnafact can learn a wide variety of combat, healing, and support actions. These are automatically designated as you infuse more and more Force into them. Of course, the tougher the enemies you fight, the more Force you will obtain. At times, not all characters in your party will have Ragnafacts, either because you haven’t located them yet or that particular character cannot wield them.

Additional weapons and accessories are created by combining various materials, sometimes with a dash of Force for good measure. These materials are collected by enemy drops after battles, looting chests and finding Harvest spots. From the Fusion option in the menu, you can create Forcefacts (disposable weapons with limited durability), accessories to protect your characters from head to toe, and special materials used for making stronger items.

Cecilia uses her Ragnafact's healing powers in battle

Hexyz Force utilizes a turn based battle system, featuring Force Burst as a special technique for the Hexyz you control. When equipped with a Ragnafact that has a strong bond with your Hexyz these Force Burst abilities are accessible. In order to use them, the Burst Gauge must have reached the minimum level required, ranging from Level 1 to 3 (the max), which slowly fills as you attack or take damage in battle.

Upon completing each Phase (aka-Chapter) of the game, Creation and Destruction points will flow into the scales of the Holy Vessel. Your actions during each Phase are tallied up and will add to the weight on both sides of the scale. Completing side quests and selecting the correct dialogue responses during conversations are a part of the scoring. General rule of thumb – the first response leans to Destruction, the middle for neutral, and the last response adds points to Creation.

Hexyz Force features several fully voiced over anime cut scenes, as well as an intriguing story filled with informative and entertaining dialogue. Everyone knows that a good roleplaying game needs a solid storyline and engaging characters, which Hexyz Force truly brings to the table. They also did an amazing job ensuring that both stories meld together harmoniously, with no discrepancies between the two that I have encountered thus far. I find myself so easily lost in the story that my PSP battery dies often. There hasn’t been a PSP title that has had that affect on me in a while, and it was an absolute delight to spend so much time with a fresh roleplaying game.

Rafael admonishes Cecilia for acting impetuously

Overall Opinion

This is definitely a game hardcore JRPG gamers will want to invest the time and money into, as well as gamers looking for a great new RPG title for the PSP library. With two stories to play through and several sidequests and areas to explore for rare items, you are easily getting at least 50 hours of game time out of Hexyz Force. Aside from the usual repetitive battle cries from the characters, the overall voice cast is pretty decent. However there are a few characters who are a bit too over the top for me. There almost always seems to be one or two of those in dubbed games. If space had allowed, I would have liked seeing the Japanese audio track with subtitles as an option, but this is a PSP title, so space is limited. For $30 US you can’t go wrong with putting Hexyz Force beside Lunar and Persona on your PSP game shelf.

You can purchase Hexyz Force on UMD or a digital download code from Amazon now

Review product (code) was provided by Atlus and does not affect the outcome of this review.